I woke up realizing what was wrong. This has been occurring for years and I never knew nor recognized it. How dare I say it, I can’t. It is too shameful to even admit. However there is no other choice than admittance. Sticking your head in the sand because you simply do not like what you see is probably the worst way of trying to solve any problem. Okay…. Here it goes….. Seriously I am doing it… any moment now, I feel it coming. I was intimidated by strong beautiful confident women, THERE! It’s out, PHEW, I am glad I got that off my chest.

I woke up one morning, having some strange dream about a girl I know. Now, it was nothing weird, but it was strange. Why am I dreaming of this girl? I know our subconscious does a lot of weird things and that there is a lot of biology, anatomy and a lot of other “y’s” connected to this, but this was different, strange in a way.

The girl that I have dreamed about is extremely beautiful, she is confident and very sure of herself (in an absolute good way). And be aware that peoples’ perception of beauty differs. I believe that everyone is beautiful and that we are all created beautiful in our own unique way. But I really found this girl physically attractive and no doubt she is confident. To get back to my story, I have worked with this girl on a few assignments before, and I have always found her to be intimidating, I was not scared of her and I enjoyed her company, but there was always something I could not place. But I think it was time for me to man up and admit that I was intimidated by her.

What makes a woman intimidating to a man? Is it her appearance? Is it her money or achievements? Yes, it may be…. but I believe that it is a man’s fragile ego. Actually just to put it straight I know that it is a man’s lack of identity and perception of what it means to be a man. See we as men grow up to believe that we need certain things to make a woman happy and accepting of us, not just women but anyone really. At least I certainly did. I grew up looking to the wrong kind of role models of what it meant to be a man, because those “role models” are what society portrayed as acceptable. I grew up believing that a real man had to have have a six pack, a nice car, a license for their big biceps and a beard so majestic that people would fall in love with you just upon the sight of splendor of your face. I grew up believing that a real man has to build something with his hands or has to make money and make deals in the boardroom. Never have I considered that a real man can be something else, can look like something else and would never require any materialistic things for a woman to love him or for any person to love him. Never have I considered that a real man does not have to be a prince charming on a a white stallion, but could merely be just an awesome guy, from a small little town on a mule. Because ultimately what we have, what we look like and what we do has nothing to do, does not even come close to who we are.

Justin Baldoni gave a Ted talk a few years ago where he said that he is done trying to be ‘man enough’. I now believe that, that is why I was intimidated by amazing women, it was because I thought that I was not man enough because my perception of what it meant to be a man was completely skewed. And what I needed materialistically to be man enough I had not yet acquired. But today I say no more! Justin calls out men at the end of his talk to stop trying to be “man enough” and just start being a man. So shall I also call upon men to stop trying to be “man enough” and just start being great men. And for me that means taking care of the people around me to the best of my abilities and to always grow as person. It also means to sometimes be taken care of, because we are not supermen, we are humans trying to be the best men we can be for our people.

___the start___